Predictions for 2010?

2010… a year we’ve been waiting for since at least the mid-80’s. It’s finally here guys — so what happens next? Every year we take the 1st of January to try and figure that out. Normally we would consult the sage-like wisdom of Engadgetdamus, but this year is special, and we thought it needed the kind of time-twisting-artificial-intelligence-color-cycling-weird-baby-monolith-Roy-Scheider-starring-space-adventure that only the the above image (and book, and movie) could evoke. Below are the predictions from the staff of ye olde Engadget — what say you, good reader?

Chris: In an unprecedented cash and stock deal valued at over $1.7 billion, Comcast acquires your ‘89 Festiva.
Thomas: Steve Jobs will announce a pair of tablets, then smash them to bits on account of Android idolatry.
Laura: Jeff Bezos will continue to predict the “death of the book.” The book will continue to exist merely to spite Bezos.
Don: The world breathes a sigh of relief that the Large Hadron Collider will never create a black hole… after it is destroyed by zombies.
Dan: Apple’s stock will plummet when a TUAW investigative report reveals that Steve Jobs actually died in 2002, and has since been portrayed by talk show host cum surreal performance artist, Arsenio Hall.
Nilay: Google finally flips the switch and creates Skynet.
Ben: Microsoft agrees that CableCARD is a failure and Media Center along with it and introduces Zune Center.
Josh F: Adult entertainment will kick-start yet another media market, this time in the form of 3D Blu-ray porn.
Richard Lai: Tamagotchi resurrects with 3D monochrome screen, and then dies.
Darren: Intel considers making an Atom that’s actually fast, but its bottom line delays the launch until December 31, 2012.
Vlad: Sony Ericsson delivers an Xperia handset on time… nah, just kidding.
Richard Lawler: Nintendo surprises everyone and releases the Wii 3D.
Josh T: Google upends the landscape of the mobile phone market when Eric Schmidt says Apple can “have one of these unsubsidized” while emphatically pointing to his crotch.

Predictions for 2010? originally appeared on Engadget on Fri, 01 Jan 2010 20:30:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

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